Is YOUR BABY developing OK?
by Carl Schyberg

Is YOUR BABY developing OK?

Doctors of psychology, medicine, psychiatry and anything
else (a PhD in any subject) have had a field day for many
years regarding child development.

One very famous doctor sold millions of his books on child
development. After about 30 years (having earned a great
fortune) he was honest and confessed that his advice to
parents had been completely wrong! The facts showed that his
advice was wrong: parents following his advice would end up
with children and young people out of control, which was the
opposite of what he intended. He should have credit for
being honest!

The simple fact is that we are all individuals. Children
don't develop according to a pattern you can draw in a
diagram! Some sort of reasonable discipline is required in
order to see our children grow up to be good citizens.
Some basic rules for our children to adhere to.

A community cannot survive for long without some rules!

Your child is an individual. If you have two children you
have two individuals. If you have three children you have
three individuals, etc.

So when you read in books what a child should be able to do
at a certain age, forget it! It is completely irrelevant to
your child's development!

When a child is born - a fantastic experience for the
parents - the first question would be: is this a healthy
baby? If your baby is born at the right time and your baby
is healthy, this is a great start to life for your baby.
Something to be truly grateful for.

If your baby has been born prematurely or with a disability
of some sort, you will not in any way let this influence
your great love and care for your baby. In most cases such a
baby will be 'spoilt rotten' and receive extra love and
care.

Nobody should blame parents for that. They are acting as
they think is best for their baby. This is what matters!

Most parents will no doubt have looked in some books about
child development.

Forget about the timing for the following developments:
When a baby should focus his/her eyes to look at you.
When a baby should follow your movements.
When a baby should grab your hands and other objects.
When a baby should try to sit up.
When a baby should try to crawl, stand up or walk.

The timing is different for different babies. Brothers and/
or sisters do not develop at the same pace. It will make no
difference to further development, if your baby can walk a
couple of months before or after the time it took an older
brother or sister.

Your baby will at some stage try to 'talk' - this lovely
international language, which is so nice to hear from a
baby, although there are no words. But you encourage your
baby to go on 'talking'. When you talk a lot to your baby,
it will not be long before you realize that your baby will
understand certain words you use.

Your baby will start crawling when he/she is ready for it.
He/she will start walking, when he/she is ready for it. Some
babies will simply leave out the crawling stage and go
straight to the walking stage. It makes no difference to
your child’s further progress. A child should be able to
develop at his/her own pace, always encouraged by the
parents, but never forced!

Lots of cuddles, lots of smiles and laughter is very
important as part of your baby's development. Your baby will
trust you completely and be pleased to follow your
encouragement for the next step in his/her development.

Spare a thought for the life in neglected children's
orphanages in some countries. No cuddles, no proper hygiene,
no love. Result: brain-damaged, under-weight children with
no proper future. If anybody treated pets like that in the
so-called civilized world, there would be action!

Give your baby an extra kiss and a hug! The sleepless nights
don't matter so much any more, do they? You are going to
give your baby the best possible upbringing with love, care
and also some sensible, firm rules.

Copyright 2003 Carl Schyberg

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